Note 16

Trust is the key to influence. When your child doesn’t study, forcing him to study will not make him like education more: instead he will be more motivated to study if you say: “I trust that you will study because you know what is good for you. I don’t need to enforce rules: you are intelligent enough to follow on your own.” True, this may not perfectly work in more systematic contexts like work and classroom, but it still is better than any other alternative. If students are smart enough to realize the value of their education, under the guidance of a teacher who knows how to teach, you can have excellent results if you keep praising the students’ potential abilities, which is a kind of trust in one’s future. If workers are fairly compensated and trusted, they will return the favour. If you expect that people respect you, then they will.

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